Author: Kimberly Low

The Tony Stark Walk.

The hubs and I watched Ironman 3 recently. With the film still fresh on our minds, our topic of conversations naturally revolved around Ironman, Tony Stark, Robert Downey Jr and my current favourite – the menacingly sexy Guy Pearce.

Anyway, while on the way to dinner, I mentioned to Gareth that I noticed someone we both know has the “Tony Stark Walk”.

Chest thrust forward, calculated steps – a walk that has swagger.

“It’s a purposeful walk”, said Gareth.

“Successful people walk like that, cause they don’t waste time walking around aimlessly. Every step is taken with an intent”.

So I asked Gareth whether he thinks he has that walk.

“I don’t. But I used to walk like that when I was working as a waiter”.

“……………………”

“What? I was a very good waiter!”.

5th of May – the morning after.

Yeap, so incredibly sad. And angry.

Am not angry because the opposition lost, to be honest I was’t even expecting an opposition victory but I really didn’t expect that it could get that dirty.

Localised blackouts at places where opposition was expecting marginal wins followed by appearances of “new” ballot boxes, delible “indelible” ink, non-malaysian voters, phantom voters, criminal intimidations, the list goes on.

And then when they’ve won through these filthy means, they had the cheeks to say that Chinese Malaysians’ complete abandonment of MCA would cause discord among Malaysians. WHAT THE FUCK?

If anything, this general elections have united Malaysians more than anything. My mom said in all her years of voting, she had never ever needed to queue, what more queuing up from the road? 80% turnout, wow Malaysians! Just wow!

In a moment of anger, I said I was devising exit plans on Twitter. Oh well, nothing wrong with some planning, just in case shit hits the fan. But, on 2nd thought, I think moving to Penang is a good enough alternative. A state government with a humble Chief Minister that flies economy, who got imprisoned for standing up for the rights of a girl of different race and treasures national heritage….dude, I’m completely sold.

5 more years of public funds abuse, racial politics, unhealthy amount of political patronage, no press freedom, the poor gets poorer, the middle-class getting more and more in debt, the rich finding themselves having to pander more to the powers that be, education going to the shitters, plundering of our environment, the list goes on.

I wish I could end this with “You asked for this!”, but we all know that it isn’t true.

Good luck Malaysians!

Musings of a first time voter.

I will be voting for the very first time. I stupidly missed out the last opportunity due to personal reasons. Okay, truth was I was afraid that G might get deported hahaha. Laugh now..it wasn’t funny then.

Anyway, this year I have decided to cast my vote because well, a pair of sandals at Charles & Keith was going for RM134. I blame the government for that.

Jokes aside.

The things that truly changed my perceptions aren’t the sandals…but the below:

1. Both my younger brothers are in danger of never affording their own homes, and that pains me.

2. Traffic jams, which I genuinely believe stems from corrupted driving schools=bad drivers, terrible road conditions and severe lack of reliable public transportation.

3. Rampant animal abuse and mistreatment of animals by local councils.

4. I don’t feel safe walking down a well-lit street alone.

5. The horrendously tacky & narcissistic home-made music videos which led me to think, “Seriously, these are the clowns that are supposed to govern our country!?”

6. MRR2. It’s feels like am playing Russian Roulette every time I’m forced to drive on that road.

7. The education system.

So yeah, that’s why I’m going to vote…despite still having a nagging feeling that G might be deported, hehehe.

It’s been several months of intense discussions, talks and speculations about our Election Commision. How much of those said are true and how much are made up? Nobody knows. Actually I don’t care lah.

Not like I can do anything!

I did print out my details on SPR website just in case those rumours of people’s names being struck off were true.

Honestly, I think it’s just technical glitch but just in case lah…you’re only wasting some ink and a piece of paper.

I’ve also heard that people wearing nail polish might be stopped from casting their votes because EC might claim that they “can’t tell the difference” of a finger with indelible ink from a finger with nail polish.

I haven’t been able to find anything official about it; the only information is that they say don’t get a manicure because the indelible ink will ruin your nail colours.

Anyway, I removed my gel manicures because just in case lah….what if they really can’t tell the difference between nail polish and indelible ink. I’m bored with my nail colours already anyway and them nails need to breathe from 3 consecutive gel manicure treatments.

Since we’re on the topic of indelible ink, I also don’t understand why they decided to mark people’s fingers before voting. Mark it after voting makes more sense right?

Apparently, it’s some kind of trickery to encourage spoiling of ballot papers. I don’t think there’s anything dodgy about it, maybe they are just scared that people might wipe it off within 30 seconds.

But just in case you’re worried about spoiling your ballot papers with the indelible ink, they say you can ask for a new ballot paper. In case they won’t give you a new ballot paper, show them a printed version of this news article. From NST one okay, must believe.

But just in case they still refuse to give you a new ballot paper anyhow, haiyaaaa vote only, lodge a complaint and cross your fingers. Most importantly, don’t be a clumsyass with your fingers.

Then, there’s a rumour that despite the increase of 3 million new voters in the electoral roll, the number of polling stations will be reduced compared to year 2008.

Apparently, this is a tactic to get voters to give-up midway queuing.

Also, there are words that polling centres would close at 5pm sharp regardless of people still queuing. I don’t think so, but just in case lah….bring a book, some snacks, umbrella, your printed details from the SPR website and lots and lots of patience ya.

I am really quite excited about voting for the first time. I’ve never felt so much ownership towards Malaysia. Whatever the outcome is, just in case lah….remember to stay home to celebrate/mourn privately ;)