My decade-old battle with atopic eczema.

My atopic eczema has taken a turn for the worst. My entire legs, shoulders, upper arms, decolletage and neck are covered in angry, itchy bumps :(

I’ve been dealing with this every year since I was 16 and yet it still feels absolutely depressing every single time. I’ve deliberately stopped seeing dermatologists because I can’t bear the idea of applying steroid creams on my skin ever again. I really believe that flare-ups that happen after steroid cream treatments are worse than the previous and would take longer to subside because the skin has thinned out so much.

Basically everything I do nowadays to deal with my eczema is just basically to prevent the rashes from itching. Eczema gets worse from scratching, the more you scratch the bigger the offending patch becomes. Once you’ve got your fill from scratching, the itch turns to pain and at that point, scarring might even occur. I still have my fuck-it moments where I scratch till my skin is raw and weeping (in fact, I had one just this morning…both my legs are lobster red now :P) and I’m pretty sure a lot of eczema sufferers would agree that feeling pain is much more tolerable than itching. But scratching is BAD. Infections, scarring…not a pretty sight.

The ways I deal with are categorised into two weather conditions; humid or dry.

When it’s hot and humid, I use calamine lotion to calm down the rashes. It does help to cool my skin down and soothes the itching a lot and prevents me from sweating much, which aggravates the rashes. Calamine is very drying so I don’t really like using it so much but I find myself using it a lot this time because of the stupid weather.

Calamine, calamine. I look like I just stepped out from a pink flour fight.

When it’s dry or when I’m in air-conditioned room, I use a lot of emollients and cream to keep my skin moisturised. I don’t have much luck with finding a good cream – they either have too much chemicals or have steroids. So, now I just apply manuka honey UMF15+ that I got online. They do help though I can’t really stand the smell. Smells like piss -_-

Manuka honey.

When showering, I use Oilatum only. It’s an emollient which you can get from most pharmacies. No chemicals laden shower gels please etc. Oilatum helps to calm down the skin very much and the skin always feel soft after using it.

I try to stay in cool or air-conditioned rooms because I find that sweating really makes it worse. I also wear long sleeves and long trousers, which I find help me to stay itch-less for many hours and even when I itch, I can rub my skin over a layer of fabric instead of direct contact, which in turn helps to negate the need to scratch. Also, long sleeves and trousers can avoid freaking people out :P

All this skin rashes talk makes me feel soooooo sexay. I don’t know why I’m doing this, scaring you guys away but I guess there are a lot of people out there suffering just like me and hopefully if you stumbled upon this post, you may find the ways I deal with my eczema useful to you too.

Just to end with a sweet note, here are some pictures of me with Koyuki and Senna, taken at Michael‘s awesomesauce BBQ Birthday Party on Saturday. Rest assured I will blog about this fabulous party.

With Koyuki, who needs no introduction.

With Senna, who is Michael’s brother, Lance’s baby girl.

Glad I was at the party before this stupid rash took over my life.

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Update: February 2013

I haven’t had a flare-up eversince I determined that citronella oil or whatever that is in those natural mosquito repellent as well as bee pollen as the causes of my eczema. It has been 2 years since I itched.

It is ironic because I can use those chemically laden mossie repellent but the organic natural ones would send me into a scratching frenzy. It took me a while to narrow the triggers down but I think getting an allergy test would help tremendously (I was too cheap/broke to get one).

When I get very stressed up though, I do have really small patches appearing on my arm or leg but they would disappear soon after I slather on copious amount of moisturiser (I use Rosken).

I urge atopic eczema sufferers to really try and determine your triggers. Be very mindful of what you used, touched or eat just before a flare-up.

I used to just dab apple cider vinegar straight onto my rashes and it burned like a beeeeeech but it did help to calm the rashes down, better than scratching really. Oilatum for showering and QV for moisturisation was the best for me during my episodes. I can’t stress enough about moisturising, it really helped to calm the rashes for me. I reapplied religiously after my skin has absorbed the lotion..roughly every 2 hours.

Good luck!

Guilt-ridden for the furryball.

Charlie has been sleeping with us in the bedroom since Day 1 and recently me and the bf made a mutual decision to move his bed and pen to the living room. He’s just shedding too much and it’s very discouraging to find your bedroom covered in hair only one day after you have meticulously cleaned it.

Banished to the living room. See how emo he looks -_-

This morning would have marked the end of the 2nd night alone for Charlie. However, I opened the door to find him lying right outside our bedroom instead of in his pen. We still don’t know whether he opened the pen himself or whether we didn’t latch it properly the night before.

And then the smell hit me. He has pooped at the doorway and pissed right next to our sofa -_-

I was livid! But having him for more than a year already, I knew it’s too late to reprimand him because he wouldn’t understand what it’s for and will probably repeat his actions anyway. Dogs are not human beings…they have no concept of past or future, they live in the moment. So the only time to reprimand a dog is when you caught him or her in the act.

We made him go into his cage and took about 1/2 hour to clean up his mess. Got to admit, eversince I got Charlie, I’ve learnt to be more patient and responsible. When Charlie was a puppy he used to poop EVERYWHERE and it was pure HELL! I used to want to give him away almost every other day. Thankfully those soulful doe eyes had managed to stop me from doing that.

Well, it’s just not Charlie to poop/pee in the house and the only reason I can think of is that he was affected by the whole sleeping alone thing :(

The other day I was just chatting with the bf about my constant guilt towards Charlie and whether it was normal. You know, I work for long hours on the laptop everyday, so most often time I cannot provide Charlie with proper playtime. What he does is that he curls up in a corner or on my feet with his eyes closed while I tap away, only moving when I call his name or touch him. Of course I don’t totally ignore him…for every hour I’m on the laptop I’d cuddle or play with him for a couple of minutes etc but I still feel like it’s not enough. I don’t know if it’s Charlie’s face or what but whenever he gives me that bored or pained expression, a little bit of me inside dies.

Curled up like that, bored out of his wits.

The bf thinks I’m crazy for feeling guilty and there’s one thing he said that really made sense to me. Charlie has to grow up and we have to learn everyday not to live our lives around him, he should be the one living his life around us.

So sorry Charlie, you’re still sleeping alone tonight :(

Happy Birthday Nicky!!!

Today is Nicky’s birthday. He’s only 2 years younger than me so he’s just turned 24!!!

Yes, both my baby brothers were born in the month of March and both of their names start with Nick. Don’t know what my parents were thinking lah.

Anyway, I wasn’t there when they celebrated Nicky’s birthday early so I’m mad now for being left out of the party. Why no one called me? I only found out from my Mom’s twit -_-

This is not a picture from last year. My Dad forgot his age -_-”

Sorry ah no presents cause you know I’m saving up for renovation :P But you know I love you Ah Boy!